Problem solvers

Eugene Devillier has — for an undetermined amount of years — hosted a gang of St. Mary High School buddies over for coffee each Wednesday in his Groves work shop. They dicuss this and that then tell everybody how things ought to be.

Quick Quote: “We solve all the world’s problems,” John Ray Meyer.

Fast fact: A popcorn machine makes the obligatory snack to go with coffee.

What makes them go: Red, plastic Folgers Coffee containers line the workshop shelves.







GROVES — When the 20-cup coffee urn is filled, the popcorn machine has the work shop smelling like a movie theater and the plastic roach (surprise!) is placed just so by the mugs, the annual Wednesday morning coffee gang is ready for action.

Retirees, who mostly know each other from St. Mary High School, gather as guests of Eugene Devillier in his Groves shop. The coffee’s ready a little after 8 a.m. and the men drink until 11, or until their wives say it’s time to come home. That’s how E. J. Dugas called it, anyhow.

That plastic roach is designed to startle newcomers, but it’s usually the same old crowd — larger or smaller, depending on doctor appointments — who gather in this inner sanctum. They drink, talk, and claim to keep fussing to a minimum.

“We solve all the world’s problems,” John Ray Meyer said.

Do they vote alike? Support the same team?

“We’re all gentlemen here. We agree to disagree,” E.J. Dugas said.

It’s easier to take that stance than to pick a bone.

“We’re all too old to run,” Meyer said.

“We can’t fight,” Dugas called out when it came his turn.

Between them sat “Meat.”

J.T. Guidry says he got this moniker during the Depression, when, as a hungry boy, he stuffed meat up his nose to save for later. The doctor’s bill cost more than the whole meal would have.

Truth or fabrication, it’s legend now. Though he didn’t have an answer when asked what variety of meat it was.

Topics come fast and furious, to the men gathered in folding chairs around tools and equipment, so talkers better keep up.

“We just got through discussing Viagra,” Devillier informed a late arrival.

“Not guilty,” shouted one coffee drinker.

Depending on who’s answering, the gang has been meeting 5 years, since yesterday or for 30 years. The wives could probably say for sure, but women aren’t a usual fixture. Devillier’s neighbor Betty McFatter gets invited for a spell sometimes, because she often furnishes the sweets. She fed the fellas a pineapple/peach dump cake this week.

Hughlen “Beb” Beadle and Don Richland were on the quiet side this session but had a few pokes for Devillier and his obsession with his popcorn machine. It’s an unusual pairing, but friends say he worked on his recipe until he made the popcorn taste just like it does at the movies, so now he makes everybody take a bag when they leave.

ddoiron@panews.com