Defending my championship in the Beat Bob Contest ought to be a piece of 2010 — about as Wade keeping his job with the Cowboys.

All I got to do is show up. Right?

There’s two women in this year’s prediction panel. There’s never been two women in the prediction panel before this year.

One guy named Pastorella is legendary for his ridiculous level of picking games.

Another named Cowles roots for PN-G against everybody and is a news guy.

West is too busy on the golf course. That’s his biggest handicap... along with being from Missouri.

Basically a lot of intelligence goes into predicting ballgames. That’s why I win. Not really.

If you know a lot of inside information about a team, chances are you’re sunk.

There’s another way to bomb out completely in the crystal ball department. Study statistics. Study them carefully with a magnifying glass.

My mother-in-law used to really jump all over me if my picture wasn’t all the way to the left of this contest. (Anything short of first place and the late dear Ms. Yvonne Jones was hacked at her son-in-law).

There’s no way to predict football games and worry about pleasing anyone but yourself. Like Ricky Nelson’s old Garden Party song, you can’t please everyone, so ya gotta please yourself.

Hunches are worth their weight in gold so long as they have a bit of logic behind them.

In other words, do not pick Lamar over McNeese just because Lamar has gone 21 years without losing a game. If McNeese did not have a football team in the last 21 years, McNeese would be undefeated over that stretch too.

Pay absolutely no attention to scrimmages, exhibition games or scores. Different teams use those games for different purposes.

Nederland is an absolute albatross for Rene’ Hebert. She graduated there. I told PN-G’s coaches last year that she would pick Nederland even if the Bulldogs were playing Southlake Carroll.

Trap picks are really bad for your health. Here’s what I mean by trap picks. Since it’s the Beat Bob Contest, Bob himself always picks out the games. Duh. Naturally.

West knows that my religious affiliation and devotion to Notre Dame causes me to take the Fighting Irish against most every team this side of Austin. So any time that Notre Dame is a slight underdog in a game, West is going to put Notre Dame in the picks, knowing full well that some of us fish-eaters will cheer, cheer for ol’ Notre Dame, even the Irish are playing the Green Bay Packers.

Beat Bob needs to rid itself completely of all Notre Dame games. That’s one rule of thumb. If the Lamar Cardinals are ineligible for Southland Conference competition, they also should be ineligible for the Beat Bob. The Lamar Cardinals are a very unpredictable batch of birds. They have loads of talent. They’ve just never played together.

To really understand football, one has to follow this theory. The home team ought to be worth about 6 or 7 points. There’s a few exceptions. Maybe the total should skyrocket to more like 9 1/2 or 10 if Tiger Stadium in Baton Rouge on a Saturday night is involved.

Never believe everything a fan tells you. Like yesterday, a long-time Port Arthur wise student of the game named Roy Calcote acted as if the Port Arthur Memorials would beat West Brook, North Shore, maybe even would win a state title.

Nicknames mean a lot. I love Bulldogs, Indians, Cardinals, Mustangs, Longhorns, even Aggies. But Titans. Oh my gosh, I’ve been trying to tell Kenny Harrison to call ’em Trojans for awhile, because people don’t even know what to make of a dang Titan. Any way, I’m pickin the Indians this week. And the Bulldogs. And the Trojans (yuck, Titans). Those may be sure wins because none of them required any lengthy thought process.

Yet here’s the great news for my buddies in Bridge City. The game which created my longest, deepest amount thought was Vidor at Bridge City. Don’t ask me why but I went with Vidor after careful consideration.

Whenever my picks go down the drain, I generally conclude “that’s what I get for thinking.’’

Now that thought does not enable me to Beat Bob West. It enables me to tie him.... because that’s what he says, when he misses a pick — “that’s what I get for thinking.’’

It’s called the Beat Bob contest. And you win more if you don’t think very much before you make your picks.

Tom Halliburton is a Port Arthur News sports columnist